After years of studies, and miles of seafaring, the International Association of Maritime Lawmakers, IAML,  whoever they are,  have created a new law which, starting July 1, 2012,  will make it unlawful for sailors to sail to weather, also known as beating,  in the North Atlantic.  There will be exemptions , for example, a yacht actively racing will be exempt from this law.   The IAML has also laid parameters to which this new law will be enforced. Called the  “Beat Index”,   this number is achieved when adding the wind velocity in knots, to the wave height in meters. So if the wind is 25 knots, and he waves are 3 meters, the Beat Index is 28. The IAML has set the minimum allowed beat index to 25, so a yacht beating in 28 of more, will be subject to fines beginning at 500 Euros.  Other exceptions will include if the yacht has less than 80 miles to go to its destination, and if the crew is “happy”.

This new law goes into effect right after an extensive over haul of the North Atlantic that  allegedly assures sailors, fishermen, ships and seafarers calmer seas, gentler winds, and less salt.

 

 

For decades, perhaps centuries, it has been a common practice to “pack paper” when traveling , or even just walking around Europe.   Public and private restrooms, also known as “WC’s”. never seem to have any toilet paper. Even in some of the finer restaurants, you’ll find a modern, clean, decorated restroom, complete with attractive paper holder, but no paper.   Recently a number of angry citizens banned together and formed the European Alliance of People with Tiny Bladders, EAPTB, and are asking lawmakers to create a fine for establishments who do not have paper in the restrooms.

“How difficult is it to jus have some rolls of paper there” asks Beatrice Foster, form London, living in Albufeira Portugal,  “The only time I found paper in the restroom was in a café that was owned and run by a woman.”   But men are fed up as well.   “I don’t get the logic” says Paul Keester,  from Holland, living in Portimao, Portugal “ They have the fancy roll containers, but no paper.”

The EAPTB hopes to have the new law in effect by this Summer, in time for the high tourist season in southern Europe.

 

 

 

 

North Atlantic Over Haul

 

Dear MOTO Gazette

 

Last week my wife and I sailed from  Morocco to the Bay of Biscay, in rough seas and Northerly winds never below 25 knots.   The waves were 3 – 6 meters and our boat took quite a beating.  This was after the “North Atlantic Overhaul” which promised us smoother conditions.   We fear this is another example of the EU flittering money away at useless projects with no logic in sight. What are they going to pay for next, a Supermarket and shopping mall in the middle of the ocean?  Considering their record of spending, this would not surprise us in the least.

 

Roger and Mary Rose  Sears,   Brussels

 

 

Lost Hat

 

Dear MOTO Gazette

 

I dropped my favorite hat in the Ocean at  N 32:42.59 and W 17:10.17,   if any one sees it please contact me at 351 915 253 999.  It is a white cotton hat that looks exactly like the one that Gillian wore in the TV show, Gilligan’s Island. Thank you very much.

Bob Denver,  United States

 

 

 

 

 

 

Soon, sailors and fishermen alike will be able to stock up or grab a few groceries, and have a coffee or a beer while passage making in the newly overhauled North Atlantic Ocean. Sponsored by the EU, the shopping center will include a Continente Grocery store,  a Sports Zone sporting goods, store,   Modelfa clothes and accessories, Worton computer and music store, Vodo phone, shoes,  book store and a cinema.   The mall will be air conditioned and have several cafes and restaurants. A welcome break from long distance sailing or fishing expeditions , this shopping center should be a success by all standards.  “What a delightful addition to the new Ocean!!” says  Pedro Silves, director of the North Atlantic Shopping Center project, “We hope to be up and running by July, 2012.”

In addition to the mall, the EU plans to build a full service marina adjacent to the shopping center, complete with a boatyard, chandlery, launderette  and internet. Boats can tie up for just a few hours while shopping, or rent a slip for a longer period of time to relax and  enjoy the break.   There is also talk of apartments and offices included in the mall project.

 

 

Skip Squid

June 12 2012

Skip Squid died suddenly while attempting to leap over a sailing yacht in the newly overhauled North Atlantic Ocean.  He crashed into the cabin top, and never saw the Sea again.  Mr Squid’s father, died in a similar fashion just a year ago in the same waters.  Mr Squid is survived by his wife, Slip.  

Services will be held at happy hour in the cockpit.